Helping Others Who Are Grieving
Apr 20, 2022 16:45:10 GMT
Post by Sef on Apr 20, 2022 16:45:10 GMT
How to Support Bereaved Others
Sometimes it can be hard to know what to say or do for someone who has suffered the loss of a pet. Here are a few suggestions for helping a friend or loved one through this difficult time:
Avoid cliches and words of wisdom. While well-intentioned, these can be hurtful. Types of comments that are not helpful include:
Helpful things to say might include:
While grieving is a very necessary part of the healing process, be aware of any signs that could indicate your friend or other loved one might need professional help. These can include:
Sometimes it can be hard to know what to say or do for someone who has suffered the loss of a pet. Here are a few suggestions for helping a friend or loved one through this difficult time:
- Offer just to sit quietly with them and allow them to cry or express other emotions. It’s not always necessary to say something.
- Offer to do shopping, laundry, or cleaning for the bereaved pet parent.
- Take a casserole or a food basket to their home.
- Respect the bereaved person’s need for time alone.
- Allow them to share their story as many times as they need to.
- Listen to what they are sharing with you without judging or trying to “fix” them or their pain.
- Avoid suggesting that they should get another pet right away. Each person needs to decide for himself/herself if and when the time is right.
- Share a happy memory of the pet.
- Offer to accompany your friend or family member to pick up their deceased pet’s cremains.
- Send flowers or a “thinking of you” gift that has special meaning.
- Make a donation in the pet’s name to a pet rescue or other animal welfare organization.
- Offer to help with any other pets during this time.
- Check in on your friend or loved one occasionally just to see how they’re doing—not just in the days immediately following the loss, but also in the weeks and months ahead.
- Feel honored to participate in the pet’s funeral or other ceremony if asked.
- Remember that holidays and anniversaries (the birth or death of the pet, etc.) can be especially difficult.
- Help put together a tribute slideshow with photos and music.
- Involve them in activities or plan new activities together when they feel ready to step back into life more.
- Do not expect your friend or loved one to grieve the same way that you would, or for the same amount of time. Everyone grieves differently and according to their own timeline. Allow them to do things at their own pace but do offer encouragement and support along the way.
Avoid cliches and words of wisdom. While well-intentioned, these can be hurtful. Types of comments that are not helpful include:
- They’re in a better place.
- I know exactly how you feel.
- It was just a bird/cat/dog/hamster, etc.
- Time heals all wounds.
- At least you have other pets.
Helpful things to say might include:
- I am so sorry for your loss.
- I know how very special __________ was to you.
- I don’t know the right words but please know that I care.
- Tell me what I can do to help (or better yet, do something thoughtful without being asked).
While grieving is a very necessary part of the healing process, be aware of any signs that could indicate your friend or other loved one might need professional help. These can include:
- Dramatic weight loss;
- Substance abuse;
- Prolonged difficulty with daily functioning;
- Withdrawing from others;
- Talking about dying or suicide. (Contact the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.)